Did I hear someone cry out? Was it a dream? As I lay there wondering what had awakened me, I heard it again, this time knowing I was not dreaming. But my son was-again.

Through his tears, he told of three big people with mean looking faces chasing him. He was frightened. Regardless how hard he tried, he could not get away from them.

This dream was similar to others over the past weeks. There seemed to be nothing we could do to stop these dreams. We felt so helpless.

Has any parent not experienced the travail of a child awakened by a scary dream and the frustration of not being able to help them? Was the dream just the product of "random neuron firing" of a busy mind? Is God giving dreams to frighten them? Could there be a message hidden behind those scary images?

There are some issues we need to consider in our effort to understand a child’s dream. Young children normally cry very easily. When a playmate takes a toy from a child’s collection, their cries would lead you to believe their world had ended. Be mindful of this point when you console them.

Avoid the standard lines such as "it was only a dream" or "you’re awake now, it was just a dream." These comments leave the impression that dreams are not important. Instead, try to get the child to talk about the dream, not only in an effort to calm them down, but to get a glimpse into their dream. There might be an important message in the dream-for you.

The caregiver’s dream

Most dreams are what we call subjective dreams, wherein the dreamer plays an active role. A subjective dream is about and for the dreamer-regardless of the other actors in the dream.

A child’s subjective dream is different in that the message is not for the child, but for the caregiver (parent or legal guardian). This dream type we call a "caregiver’s dream"-about the child but meant to draw a response from those caring for the needs of the child.

For this reason, it is very important that caregivers give attention to the dreams of children who are not yet old enough to influence their own environment. These children are usually powerless to affect change in their situations. Through a dream, God may be drawing the parents’ attention to a child’s problem.

In other words, God gives the dream to the child hoping to alert the caregiver to some difficulty the child is facing.

The dream of the three mean adults chasing the child is an example of a "caregiver’s dream." One day a father had opportunity to leave work early and pick up his son from the daycare centre. On arriving, he could hear the loud voices of staff locked in an intense argument. When he coughed to forewarn his entry, they stopped and put on a very pleasant demeanor. While driving off, he realized there were three adults there and the pieces of the puzzle came together.

This daycare centre, with these three angry adults, was the object of the child’s dream. The anger displayed by the staff was discomforting to the child. When the parents placed their son in another daycare facility, one with a more pleasant atmosphere, their son’s dream stopped. God caught their attention and they responded.

Through a dream, God is able to alert the attentive caregiver. The following are some examples of "caregiver’s dreams."

Bloody Mary

Dream: In a house is a closet. If someone says ‘click’ while walking past, the door opens and then slams shut. Bloody Mary lives in that closet. Some people move in upstairs. They have a pet. The pet goes into the closet. The owner goes to the closet to get the pet. There is a hole in the wall and a cobweb. They pull on it. They find a picture of Bloody Mary carving a pumpkin. As they pull on the cobweb, Bloody Mary pulls them in.

This dream was very frightening to a seven-year-old girl. At that age, she would have had little understanding into the dream. More importantly, she would have had little ability to control the cause.

Asking the child about the dream revealed some important issues and events that the parents may want to change.

During a sleepover, the kids in this girl’s Brownie troop told scary stories. A favorite character in many of these stories was Bloody Mary. At that young age, sensitive children have difficulty separating reality from fiction. In this case, the stories continued to scare and affect the child and her dreams for weeks thereafter.

Did God give the dream to the child for her sake, or for the parents? A child would have little or no ability to control the activities at a sleepover. Peer pressure would hold sway. Once alerted to these story times by the dream, the parents could intervene on behalf of the child to eliminate future trauma and to counsel her through the present problems.

The Mud Girl

Dream: My dad and I are lying on a couch. I ask him if I can get some tomatoes for supper. He says yes. I go outside to get them. The mud girl is there but goes into the house. She kills my dad. The mud girl tells me to go to another place. I just stand there. She tells me again but I just stand there. She kills me. I go to heaven and ask Jesus what I should do to the mud girl-should I kill her, or leave her alone? He tells me to destroy her. He gives me vinegar. I go and pour it on her and she dies. My dad comes alive and we have supper.

This little girl lives in a foster home. Her real parents have separated and her father is in depression, spending most of his time on the couch. A part of her believes she is responsible for the difficulties between her parents and for the pain that her father carries. As a child, she is helpless to intervene or to solve the dilemma. Compounding her problem is the foster home situation. Her caregivers are limited in their ability to respond to the message of the dream.

Ideally, her parents should hear the dream and understand that she is carrying the responsibility for their separation. They could then take steps to correct that misunderstanding and in doing so, relieve this young one of a load she should not have to carry. Alternatively, the caregivers, alerted to the message of the dream, could seek help for the child.

Snakes in the crib

A three-year-old boy woke up and was standing at the side of his crib crying. After the parents were able to comfort him, he told them there were snakes crawling all over him when he lay there.

They realized his older brothers had been catching snakes in the fields around the house and may have been chasing, scaring or threatening the child with them. After the dream alerted them, the parents were able to take steps to curtail the siblings’ activity and to help the child out of the fears that were having an influence on him.

Ice cream fright

A child in elementary school had a scary dream in which she is eating chocolate ice cream and vanilla ice cream. She knows the chocolate ice cream is bad but the vanilla is good.

Because of family difficulties, the authorities placed the child in the care of a guardian who cared for the well-being of the child but had little regard for dreams. The child was expressing difficulties through aggressive behavior and a refusal to go to school. The guardian brought the child to a counselor who was alert to the message of the dream.

The biological mother had loved and cared for the child until she died prematurely. She was white. Her father was black and, from her birth, had abandoned them. The child was responding, in anger, toward her father’s rejection-the chocolate ice cream.

As a child, she was not able to respond to the dream, but God gave the dream to alert those caring for her to the problem.

Children are special to the Lord. He is concerned for their well-being. Children today face many problems not experienced by their parents. Relationship conflicts and abuses may be difficult for the child to comprehend and verbalize. Threats might cause them to be secretive, but a dream may be the vehicle through which God alerts the caregivers-pay attention.

Steve Bydeley, with his wife Dianne, are co-authors of Dream Dreams, a biblical perspective on the interpretation of dreams and visions for today. They can be reached at www.lapstoneministries.org